Debate Disaster

Tarun Pradhaan

*This article is for the seekers of knowledge who are relatively new and who get into the traps of toxic debates sometimes unknowingly.*

**Debates or Arguments**

In simple words it is a conversation between two parties (or individuals), where the goal is to prove or disprove a proposition. The proposition can be a topic of philosophy or science or something worldly like being accused of a crime etc.

Usually there is a mediator (or moderator or judge) and at the end of the debate he/she decides who wins it and what is proven.

The result is (hopefully) advancement in a specific field.

**Ancient Practices**

Debating is an ancient art. You must have heard about debates happening in the courtrooms of kings on all kinds of matters. That includes debates on philosophy, religion and spiritual matters also, depending on the interests of the king. It also took place in ancient universities and probably in some ashrams under a guru.

The fundamental principles of debating are described in detail in Nyaya philosophy, including the means of knowledge, logic and what constitutes a proof or evidence. Every seeker of the path of knowledge must read about it, it is an essential reading for all of us.

For many thousand years, this was an important (but not necessary) way to prove a proposition or to refute someone elses propositions or theories. It contributes to the progress of science, judiciary, ethics, philosophy and spirituality.

Some traditions still encourage debate but mostly it seems it has faded out or is scattered and is now restricted to court rooms only. Sometimes we see some debate competitions in schools or universities, which are somewhat like a sport. Debates also happen in parliaments as a show of power or to influence decisions.

**Contemporary scene**

In modern times the word debate has acquired a negative meaning. Children who debate or argue with parents are considered mannerless and are scolded or punished. These indoctrinations happen very early. In schools etc. students who argue with teachers are expelled out or are punished. Students who argue with others are seen as aggressive and violent, and no one wants to be friends with them. And so on.

Most debates are now a means to insult, harass, compel or pressure somebody. Debates cause very bad fights, negativity, hatred and the losers suffer from social anxiety, fear, inferiority complex and a loss of self confidence. Usually the winner is also hated by all, becomes full of hubris and behaves like an animal who just defeated another animal in a herd fight.

Especially, in the philosophical context, the original spirit of advancement of the field or use of debate for learning is lost. You can still see some remains of it, and rarely these debates provide any insight. Usually nothing is learnt, and no advancement happens. It has to do with loss of human intelligence and civility or culture. These are the dark ages of debate.

**When to debate**

Never.

But if you are still interested. You can try it in these conditions:

* When your guru instructs you to do so. Usually that will be with his own students. 
* When you know your opponents personally, such as when they are your friends, relatives etc. and when you are sure that your relationship with them will not suffer because of it. 
* When it is like a sport or competition. 
* When it is absolutely necessary. 
* When there is an honest and neutral moderator. 
* When the other party is reputed, civil and cultured. 
* When the other party knows the laws of debate as per the Nyaya scriptures. (Provided you also know that)

**When not to debate**

Make it a rule that you will never argue or debate, especially on the matters of philosophy and spirituality.

You must not enter into a debate when:

* Your guru has not approved it. 
* You have no need to do it. 
* You have nothing to gain or learn from it. 
* There is no moderator, or judge or neutral third party to decide the outcome. 
* You do not trust the judge. 
* The subject is illegal, unethical, vulgar or controversial. 
* You do not know the other party (such as on the internet or online communities/groups). 
* You love your partner, friends, siblings, parents or relatives and do not want to poison these relationships. 
* You sense that the other party is uncultured, violent, stupid and has bad intentions. 
* You see that the other party is not really interested in learning anything. 
* The other party belongs to a different path. 
* The other is a student of another guru or is not even a student. 
* The other is full of indoctrination or blind beliefs. 
* The other starts the conversation with personal insults and bad language. 
* The other has never heard about Nyaya. 
* The other is overly negative, hateful and toxic. 
* The other attacks without provoking. 
* They are trolls. 
* They attack you in groups of two or more people (usually a preplanned attack). 
* A big sum of money is offered as a prize. 
* There is a bet. 
* There are chances of financial or reputation loss. 
* The other is from an enemy country, rival community or is a competitor in business etc. 
* The other is a religious extremist or from a political party. 
* There is a conflict of interest. 
* Some people are trying to use you for cheap entertainment by triggering you or pressing your buttons. 
* Some one is trying to manipulate you in the debate, just to see your reaction. 
* Someone is trying to benefit from you debating on their behalf. 
* Someone provokes you into an argument on grounds of moral duty, patriotism etc. 
* You sense a danger, usually argument is the first step leading to violent attacks and murders. 
* You sense lowliness, competition, racism, greed, low intelligence and defensiveness from the other. 
* The other party has no knowledge about the subject. 
* The other party was misinformed or manipulated into the debate. 
* The other is brainwashed or believes in conspiracy theories or pseudosciences. 
* The other declares themselves as superior. 
* The other is a minor. 
* The other is simply testing your knowledge or patience. 
* The other is trying to demotivate you or trying to stop you from being successful in your career, work, project or spiritual practice. 
* The other insults your path and guru.

This list is incomplete, there are hundred other reasons to not debate.

**Advantages**

My personal opinion is that there are no advantages of a debate. Nothing useful is ever gained. However, a **healthy** debate can sometimes :

* Make your logical abilities better 
* Make you smarter 
* Make you confident 
* You learn something new 
* You learn that you are stupid 
* You come to know your ignorance 
* You come to know your own lowliness 
* You get the bitter fruits and bad karmic consequences of doing it

I have never seen anyone benefitting from a debate, especially in the spiritual field.

**Disadvantages**

You must have guessed it, this list is long. But some main disadvantages are:

* It is completely useless and unnecessary. 
* Nothing is learnt by both parties. 
* No progress happens. 
* There is no point in proving that you are right, if you know it well, especially when the other party is not willing to agree. 
* You are not forced or obliged to prove anything to anyone. Especially, spiritual beliefs are your personal matter. 
* It does not matter if a random person does not agree with you. People are not important, your own progress is. Your time is very precious. 
* Wastes an enormous amount of time. 
* Produces bitterness, negativity, toxicity, enmity, violence. 
* Causes crimes and fights. 
* You will easily lose the favor of your guru. 
* Friends will leave you, seeing your aggressive behavior. 
* Causes guaranteed failure of relationships. Love becomes hate in a few minutes. 
* Causes lowliness, stupidity and inflames animalistic tendencies. 
* Is very insulting for the loser. 
* The loser becomes terrified, full of guilt and shame, traumatized. 
* The loser is demoralised, suffers from social anxiety, inferiority complex and other mental issues. 
* The loser usually never accepts the evidence, becomes even more closed minded. 
* The loser vows to take revenge, becomes an extremist. 
* The loser resorts to unlawful means to win next time. 
* Losers plan a counter attack, usually they do not accept defeat even when proven wrong. 
* Losers cling to worse theories, superstitions and blind beliefs in self defense. 
* The winner becomes more egoistic, full of pride and hubris. 
* The winner acquires a false sense of superiority. 
* The winner becomes more and more aggressive with each win and turns violent eventually. 
* The winner treats the other party like a slave or an animal. 
* The winner imposes an arbitrary punishment on the loser. (Ancient stories speak of the loser made to give up his property, cows, wife and daughter, they were humiliated and were made to ride on a donkey with a face painted with black paint. The variety of punishments depends on whatever the winning party could imagine.) 
* The winner kills the opponent. (Ancient stories depict the loser being beheaded, burnt alive, drowned or tortured and killed. Some commit suicide.) 
* A civilised winner will still try to cause some harm, such as financial loss. 
* Winner starts attacking other people, and becomes a bully, once he sees that he can defeat others easily. 
* Winner refuses to learn anything new, declaring himself as all knowing. 
* A single win can cause close mindedness for life. Progress stops. Ignorance is cemented. 
* People form gangs to defeat some innocent person. 
* No positive change happens in debaters. 
* No one improves, both parties degrade. 
* Disturbs social harmony, causes political wars.

**How to avoid debates**

* Remain silent. 
* Do not reply. 
* Do not talk or meet the other, stay away. 
* Do not try to teach or to make the other understand. 
* Completely ignore the other. 
* Block or ban. 
* Take leave silently. 
* Do not display your knowledge before unknown people. 
* Do not impose your beliefs on others. 
* Do not boast. 
* Do not insult stupid or ignorant people. 
* Do not point out the errors or faults, unless someone politely requests you to. 
* Do not criticize unknown people. 
* Do not feed the trolls. 
* Do not get triggered or yield to lower impulses when someone challenges you in an insulting way. 
* When someone tries to prove that you are ignorant and inferior, simply accept it, do not try to prove the opposite. It is smartness and humility, it is not shameful. 
* Avoid people in general. 
* Do not bring up controversial matters in discussions. When you see someone doing it, leave that place. 
* Seek better company, better people and intelligent friends. 
* Leave toxic people and relationships immediately. 
* Stay calm when provoked for debate. 
* Stay in awareness, see the dream unfold. 
* Break the karmic bonds, let go. 
* Live in solitude, in peace and bliss, away from the noise of society.

These tips are applicable for online interactions also.

**Alternatives**

Now that you know how evil the debates are, you can question their effectiveness as a learning tool. If you really wish to learn, or improve your intelligence or logical abilities, try these tricks:

* Learn about the subject systematically from a good teacher. 
* Follow great masters, books, logicians and mathematicians. 
* Befriend a good lawyer. 
* Contemplate and introspect daily. 
* Cultivate a habit of writing. Express your ideas in writing and get them reviewed. 
* Learn about logical fallacies. 
* Learn about cognitive biases. 
* Learn about psychology. Learn to detect and avoid mentally distorted people easily. 
* Learn by asking questions. A teacher is necessary. 
* Get your doubts cleared from your teacher, not from others. 
* Learn from your own experience. 
* Have a clear life goal. Do not make other people your life goal. 
* Try to teach only the worthy seekers after taking the permission of your guru. 
* Cultivate love, compassion, kindness and patience. 
* Work hard to earn your knowledge. Practice practice practice.

**How to ask a question ?**

Many times Im horrified to see that people, even seekers, do not know how to ask a question. Their debater mentality shows up occasionally. So here are some tips.

* Do not ask someone who knows nothing about the subject. 
* Do not ask random people on the internet. 
* Do not insult your guru in the guise of a question. Show love and respect. 
* Do not display how great you are before asking something. Stay humble. 
* Do not pose the question as a challenge. 
* Do not pose the question as a puzzle. 
* Do not use too much poetry or metaphor, keep it clear and straight. 
* Do not use a flowery or sycophantic language for the question. 
* Keep it as short as possible. 
* Do not ask about personal issues or social issues. 
* Do not be biased. Be open to accept the answer. But verify its truth. 
* Cultivate qualities of a seeker before approaching a guru. 
* Do not approach a guru whom you do not like. 
* Always ask politely. Show civility and culture. 
* Learn to be civil also, not just smart. 
* Think about the question for sufficient time before asking. See your errors, if any. 
* Do not ask too many questions. It irritates many people. Wait for your turn. 
* Do not ask offtopic questions. Stay on the path. 
* Do not mix languages or use impure language. Learn it first. 
* Learn to speak clearly. 
* Try to understand the answer, take your time. Do not immediately start asking counter questions. 
* If you disagree with the answer, do not tell it, simply drop that path or guru. 
* If you do not get satisfactory answers and this happens frequently, simply leave that guru silently. 
* Do not try to teach the guru. No guru likes this. 
* Do not ask the question when you already know the answer. No need to collect opinions of all the gurus in the world. 
* In online meetings, save your time by writing down the questions beforehand. This alone can show you the answers sometimes.

**Respect for a teacher**

You should have a great respect for the teacher and his/her teachings. Teachers can sense it very easily, if you do not have respect, or if you are faking it, and then they will avoid you forever. Remember, gurufield is always watching, do not talk rubbish about your teacher or any other teacher behind their back.

Anyway, there is no point in joining a teacher you do not like, you will simply waste your time in arguments and debates, you will learn nothing. Usually teachers get rid of such students even if they are bright, and they prefer a worthy or obedient student, even if they are not so bright.

**Respect for senior seekers**

Always respect your seniors, they surely know more than you, they surely have achieved more than you have. Thinking that they are also just like you - a student, and arguing with them on petty matters, will cause your own loss. They will avoid you, will never advise you or help you again.

In spiritual circles, no student claims to be a senior, they are very humble, they will declare that they know nothing at all. They are very decent. Sometimes a new student with an argumentative mentality sees that as their inferiority, because they are not boasting, and starts treating them badly. Remember, humility is not stupidity or weakness. Such people quickly lose the favor of seniors.

Nothing remains hidden forever, and some of them go and tell the guru about this kind of behavior, resulting in expulsion, and that causes major spiritual harm.

**Respect your peers**

Always respect your peers. You are at the same level as them, you are not better or superior. When a person joins a new path, new ashram or a new guru, especially after he/she had a previous path and some amount of progress and practice, they turn nasty on their peers, declaring them as inferior fools. I have 20 years of experience on the other path, what do you know - they will declare. That can cause some trouble.

When you are a newcomer, forget the old, adopt the new, clean your slate completely. Make room for the new teachings, new path. Remain humble and accept your ignorance. You are here to learn, not to argue with others about how great your last path was or how big a master you are.

Peers will either hate you, or become fearful of you and will avoid you. This cannot be hidden from the sharp eyes of the teacher.

**Respect and care for juniors**

Help your juniors. Be loving, caring and kind, especially for the younger people. You were also like that in the past and you reached here because of grace only. There is no need to belittle them with your superior debating skills. Do not try to teach them, that is not your job, that is your guru's job. Your job is to learn, simple.

When you start teaching your juniors, you are sending a signal that the guru is not doing his/her job properly. And the guru will not like it. If at all you must teach, take the permission from your guru. Even if you wish to help the juniors you must ask your guru first. The skill of teaching is a very different ability, not all have it. You can harm a junior with your uncooked teachings. It can have very bad consequences.

**Conclusions**

Debating is, no doubt, a very useful skill, but it is good for lawyers etc. not for a spiritual seeker. The overall effect of debate and argument is always negative. It never causes learning or improvement in any of the parties.

It is very good to have a detailed knowledge of Nyaya or logic and to have a decent ability to form an argument and to prove it using a perfect logic, but this ability must be used for your own benefit and for the benefit of all, not for winning a debate or for showing your intellectual superiority and humiliating others.

You also need to be aware of people who argue, they are not your friends, they do not have your well being as their goal, they do not have good intentions. Avoid them at all cost, learn methodically, and be in peace and bliss.

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Wise Words

Debate Disaster

Tarun Pradhaan